MORE HELGA DIARIES

Dear Helga,


I hate this school! They're mean to me. I want to go home.

Bobby



Helga:

Bobby, please give me more information. I will not tolerate teachers or students being mean to other students.



Bobby's Reply:



Dear Helga,

I am Bobby who wrote to you. I am in kindergarten.

Can't you help me?



Helga:

Bobby, you need to stay off the computer! If I find where you are, your principal is going to be really mean. And so am I!

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Dear Helga,

I have the worst problem ever! My brother is being really bad. He hits me, bites other people and my mom won't do anything to him. He won't quit.

I'm afraid he is going to do something really bad.

Can't you help me?

Anonymous in Washington, DC



Helga:

Dear Anonymous, I would suggest that you let a neighbor know or a relative.

Let me know if that helps. And don't forget to write back.



Reply from Anonymous In Washington, DC



Dear Helga,

I am Anonymous in Washington, DC. I wrote to you about my brother. The neighbors won't do anything and neither will anyone in my family.

What should I do? Call the police?



Helga:

Anonymous in Washington, DC: Could you send me a private message so I can find out who your brother is? I might be able to suggest another way you can get help.





Reply from Anonymous in Washington, DC:



Dear Helga:

I am Anonymous in Washington, DC. My brother's last name is Edwards.

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Dear Helga,

Nothing is getting done in my house. The carpet isn't swept, the dishes aren't done and there are no clean clothes to wear! I am at my wits end. What can I do? All I do is watch news day and night on tv.

Carl in Cincinnati



Helga:

Dear Carl: Does this need a reply?

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Dear Helga,

My brother is wearing all of my clothes when I am not home! Every time I come home, I find my stuff thrown all over my bedroom. And when I try to find something I really want to wear, it's not there. What should I do to my brother?

Suzi

Helga:

Suzi something is wrong with your brother. Surely you know that by now!

Buy a padlock, put it on your door and wear the key to it around your neck.

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Dear Helga,

Things are just so bad. My food supply is running out and I hardly have any water to drink. No one should have to live like this. What can I do?

T. in Maryland



Helga:

Dear T.in Maryland: You don't tell me how old you are or if you are a boy, girl, man or woman. Yes, you situation is very bad. But I need more information in order to help you. Please write back and tell me more. I'll be waiting!



Reply from T. in Maryland:

Dear Helga,

I'm the one who wrote to you that I hardly have any food to eat or water to drink. What am I supposed to do? Get in the car and drive to the store?

I can't do that. Cats aren't allowed to drive and besides I don't have any money.



Helga:

Dear T.in Maryland: You are the first cat who has written to me. I'm so proud that you know how to use a computer! Your owners must be really bad is all I can say.

You need to go to youtube and post a video of this horrible plight. And things will be so much better for you.

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Dear Helga,

My neighbors are just awful. They scream and fight and throw stuff all over the place. It's really bad. I can't move so what am I supposed to do?

Tom in prison



Helga:

Dear Tom: Here is what you do. Stay in your cell and leave me alone.

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Dear Helga,

Things are not going well at all. When I'm in my car, I have to go 90 mph just to get home. I can't take this much longer. And when I get home, I have to close all of the blinds and leave everything off. No one should have to do this.

The Rock in Detroit



Helga:

Dear The Rock in Detroit: When is the last time you checked with your parole officer?

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Dear Helga,

Oh oh I hate my life! I am ready to jump off the bridge. People are abusing me by calling me names and telling me I am going to crack up and be smashed to pieces! Can't you help me, please?

H.D.



Helga:

Your name wouldn't happen to be Humpty Dumpty would it? I'll just bet it is.

And I have news for you: What you wrote is going to happen and all the king's horses and all the king's men won't be able to put you back again. So there!

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Dear Helga,

I was afraid to write to you but here I am! I am eating lunch and dinner out every day and gaining weight and can't understand it.

Crissy in Georgia



Helga: Crissy: Look up idiot in the dictionary.