THE RUBBER STAMP

About sixteen years ago, a friend asked me what I wanted for a Christmas gift. I told her “Surprise me!” With Christmas approaching, I wondered what on earth her gift or gifts would be. You see, we both like giving and receiving unique gifts. And so I waited and waited.

The week before Christmas, she came bearing gifts and they were all in a huge bag. After she came in, sat down and got comfortable, I gave her the gifts I had picked out and she handed me that huge bag. She started tearing open presents while I sat there in a stunned state. Truthfully? I like to wait to open mine but I did grab the first box I saw inside the bag. It was small and I couldn’t figure out what on earth it was by shaking it.

Tearing into it, I found a big rubber stamp but what it had on it made me laugh out loud for it had DUMB on it. “Look in the bag again” she said. I pulled out a red ink pad. “Oh you knew I wanted this!” I screamed. Really I did for I had mentioned it to her months before. “Where did you get this?” I asked. “I had it made at a printing place. And guess what?” “What?” I pleaded. “The woman that handed it to me wanted to know what DUMB stood for. I just looked at her, paid her and left! And I thought all the way to my car how stupid that woman was.”

When I heard those words, I burst out into laughter or more like howling. “Why did she ask you what DUMB meant?” “Either she didn’t know that word or thought it was an acronym.” “Good grief!” I howled. “I mean there are the not so smart people and then those other ones.”

Both of us were in fits of laughter. She had given me that stamp and ink pad because I had mentioned that I’d love to have one to stamp someone’s forehead with it. “But would they know what it meant?” I asked her. “I doubt it” she said. Well, that was long ago and no, I never did smack anyone’s forehead with the stamp although there have been too many times when I wish I would have. But the thought of a lawsuit didn’t appeal to me at all.

And that rubber stamp is still right here in my house. Says DUMB on it. As for the ink pad, it dried up a long time ago but ah, I do have many that still are not.

What a hilarious Christmas gift that was and it really was appreciated. I look at if often and remember the howling that both of us did. If you’d like to borrow it, maybe I’ll lend it to you. But it does come with a warning: The person that gets whacked with it on his or her forehead will have to look in a mirror. And that person just might contact a lawyer. Are you brave enough? Smile.

Sherry Hill
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Sherry Hill
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